Uncategorized – Nature's Path

The Gift of Sleep

Sleep

A day with the Earth. No other voice.

And now, in the last hour, her presence grows stronger. Instead of fading into darkness, the Earth makes herself felt deep within me. In what meditation calls ‘the still centre’, the hollow just below the navel, I feel filled and fulfilled.

Earth’s stillness becomes my stillness. Her silence, my calm thought.

Natural as a mother’s young who nudge toward the safe place she creates, sleep will follow.

The above words write themselves, after I spend a day alone and never switch on the news in any sound form.

In the current pandemic, many of us have trouble finding sleep. Fear escalates and speeds away rest, bringing nightmares instead. It seems as though we can’t help it. Yet, after working in communications for many years, what I’ve found is that we can choose not to hear many of the voices who cause fear.

‘News’ is not the equivalent of truth, but something manufactured, designed to keep us as listeners, helpless in the face of what is presented as insurmountable. Radio and TV announcers are trained to put the kind of urgency and emphasis into their delivery which heightens our fear and dependence on them.

When I quit the communications business after fifteen years, the first thing I did was to cut myself off from TV and radio. What we hear has a direct line to the brain, one that I don’t want to offer to sources I have learned not to trust. The Internet has now shown that the advent of fake news even taints the word as text, with many news and social media feeds being heavily biased. More and more, silence becomes the cleanest option for sleep hygiene. If we need updates, local health announcements on email are more specific to our individual health and lack artificial drama. Even these, I allow to access my thoughts in a sparing and controlled way. For example, I avoid news reports at times when my sub-conscience is most vulnerable, such as when I first wake up, or in the hours leading to bedtime.

I’m not suggesting that we all bury our heads in the sand. But in our news-saturated time, most of us do the opposite: we let ourselves become defenseless in the presence of those who seek to profit by launching more and more fears into our psyche.

If there is only one message I can give to those who share this pandemic situation with me, it is: let’s be more selective about what allow into our minds. No one should rob us of the rest that renews.

We sit patiently and allow muddy thoughts to clear. Life then lives itself in us. –quote adapted by William Martin from the Tao te Ching

After Christmas: Let Boxing Day be different

My mind is not noisy with desires…

And my heart has satisfied its longing. Psalm 131

As I write this, deep snow has settled on the evening of December 25^th. The Christmas shopping ritual has just ended. On my car radio, among the tinny carols, I hear Van Morrison repeat a phrase from Poetic Champions Compose: non-attachment, non-attachment.

For those of us like me, who overspent again this year, and felt retail’s hollow afterthought where our spirit should have been, the song rings like an anthem for 2017. Non-attachment is currently best known as a Zen way of thinking about the world without clinging to it, nor to our position in it. Yet the above Psalm, quoted by Muslim, Jewish and Christian holy men, reveals that the idea of non-attachment continues in many other spiritual traditions.

As I quietly step in, brush off the snow and hang up my coat, I find solace in the silence. Perhaps it’s not too late to find a new path for the holidays. I live five minutes from a supermall, and the thought of returning there for Boxing Day shopping tomorrow sickens me. So does the thought of plowing through all the excess food and gifted goodies in my kitchen.

Boxing Day is so named because, for hundreds of years, those who had plenty would distribute their extra food and clothes to the poor. The idea of using this day for the prosperous to accumulate yet more, is relatively recent, a nightmare invented by retailers.

As I turn off the tree lights for the night, a thought comes to me. My local YMCA is collecting food for local shelters and the town food bank. I remember that late on Christmas Eve, I noticed that, though we are one of the wealthiest communities in the country, the box was only half-full. Tomorrow afternoon, Dec. 26, is the time scheduled for the box to be sent out. I can still make a difference!

I shrug off the fatigue I’ve been feeling from a day of too much food, too many gifts, and swing into action. I find a large box of my own, and fill it with tinned soups, stews and all my extra boxed cookies and chocolate. A clear recycling bag enables me to add the clothing I’ve received but don’t need.

I have a new plan for tomorrow now. I’m going to bypass the mall, drop off my donation, and offer to help distribute to the needy. As William Blake, the poetic conscience of the early Industrial Age, wrote:

“ You never know what is enough until you know what is more than enough.”

The light that wells up in me – Strategies for coping with S.A.D. this winter

After a day trapped in the city, its noise and shadow still closing in, I cut through rough country, to where still water hides. On the shore’s soft edge, I cross my legs and lean back into the hammock of my raised arms. So keenly the day distills into this small lake, I can barely contain the light that wells up inside me.

Did you know that our bodies read artificial light as darkness? I learned this as a teacher, watching students drowse beneath the brightest of fluorescents on the ceiling. Natural light is much more subtle, more susceptible to the kind of complex ‘reading’ a human body performs. As soon as I flicked the switches off, and lifted the blinds, the young people opened toward me, like flower-faces at dawn.

Early man did not just use light as a means to prolong work. He interpreted it to understand weather, and the changing seasons. His senses took from it complex clues, such as when plants would be ready to eat, and which sides of a ravine, chosen for shelter, would allow his children to grow and prosper. Far in the reaches of his brain, there turned rhythms. Light-sensitive, these led his body around the circle of a day toward the deep, ingrained marker where he would fall asleep.

The loss of Circadian rhythms is perhaps the single deepest felt loss our recent generations have sustained. Electricity has forced countless shift workers into poor health and prolonged mental confusion, as they struggle to overcome what the body knows. Tube lights notwithstanding, our inner self feels acute awareness of the dark, and the need to sleep. Beyond factories, many office workers are so strapped for time during the day, that we try to cheat our bodies with night-time chores, such as shopping. This turn forces retail workers into night work limbo. In Northern countries, higher proportions of us spend whole work-weeks without natural light than ever before.

Small wonder that many of us begin to feel ‘low’. When you have no sight of the sky, where will you find room to soar? I challenged myself with this question when, in my early thirties, I lost motivation as soon as daylight savings time ended. I had never heard of S.A.D. (Seasonal Affective Disorder), but my family doctor had no doubt that it was the cause of my listlessness and depression in late fall.

Strategies for coping with S.A.D.

Just the way you would move a houseplant to catch the sun, I began to seek ways into the light. Below I’ll share with you what worked for me.

1)I stopped taking the subway to work, walking blocks in pearly light to watch the morning rise.

2)I took in fresh air and outdoor light every lunchtime, nourishing all my senses, not just my tongue.

3)If winter days were short, I’d take an outdoor stroll or run near my work location, rather than sliding into the gym when I got home.

4)Most of all, I made a quest of each small park, ravine and body of water concealed within my urban environment. (Water reflects and magnifies light, so it can cause your eyes and spirit to lift on even the dullest day.)

5) Find a way to hold and cherish your moments of light, by drawing, word sketching, or even composing a song. (This piece was written by a hidden urban lake, in a small window of time.) Let’s return now to where that window opens…

Just before sunset, the lake lays down a path into the Milky Way, leads my eye down through the depths of clouds, toward planets submerged beyond.

At this moment, I glimpse why people immerse(baptise) to become holy –

Water is the closest sky.

Find Life Beyond Work in the New Year

Those who create are like you [God].

They long for the Eternal. -Rilke

Thinking of some New Year’s Resolutions this year? Consider not making any, except for one:

Live forever.

Stated simply, that’s the goal of every creative person — to make something that will outlast the moment, and transcend the repetition of ordinary, work-a-day life. It’s no accident that many of the world’s great artists and musicians have led exceptionally long lives. Beyond this, their creations have transcended time to enchant and inspire generations after them.

To live creatively in the coming year, I think it’s important to see the differences between a resolution and a goal.

Resolution	Goal
-an intention	– an action
– untimed	– linked to a schedule
– without a plan for measurement	– with feedback built in
– stated in vague, general terms	– written and noted in clear, specific language
– is my responsibility to meet alone	– draws on support from many different teachers, mentors and heroes

So how does “Live forever” become specific? It’s the difference between “doing something after work” and “practicing the saxophone for at least an hour every day (3 on weekends) so that I’ll be good enough to join a jazz band next September”.

I was once present at an interview with the hugely successful writer Nora Roberts. She described starting out as a busy mom, with only the kitchen table as her workspace. To beat the endless chores and distractions, she set a deadline every night. She strictly forbade herself to go to bed until she had met a certain number of words. And her page quotient went up every week!

Every night, Nora turned her table into a kind of altar to the writers she admired. She stacked her favourite books around her. She recorded and replayed radio and TV appearances by her favourite authors. When her kids were old enough to go to school, she took classes at a nearby college. There she learned about writers’ conferences, a way to get closer to her role models and to meet those who would one day publish her writing. When it came time to submit herself to the ordeal of rejection letters, she drew on her personal background of spirituality to keep faith in herself and keep creative.

“But I’m not good enough,” you may be thinking, or “I’m too old to start now.” The idea of rejection brings us to the red flag thought that stops so many of us from being creative: “What if I fail?”

In the Western world, many of us have been raised to think of success as a kind of reward program, usually measured by material gain. Yet there are many instances of people such as J. Randolph Hearst and Howard Hughes, who found that, the more they could accumulate in cash and objects, the less happiness and quality of life they could find.

To balance the material weight that seems to tip our life balance, many Westerners have come to consider the East. The Buddhist concept of “non-attachment” to an outcome allows believers to set goals, but to be flexible about how to achieve them. This simple shift widens the lens that can make a set-in-stone goal seem daunting. It puts the emphasis on life as process, the unique unfolding of an individual. For example, it can make a player like Sonny Rollins stop clearing the classical hurdles, and find a music of his own.

Hearing that jazz giant still play, well into his eighties, reminded me that living creatively means living longer. I also recently spent time seeing the works of Georgia O’Keefe, who only began painting very late in life. Upcoming in this space, we’ll be exploring the reasons why creativity is good for your health, including the concepts of stimulus, a proven way to prevent depression and flow, a mental state which enables time to be used for nourishment rather than fatigue.

Do you have a creative hobby that has made a difference in your life? Do you know a long-lived creative person whose story you’d like to share? This blog is open to comments and welcomes positive input. Can’t wait to hear from you!

Venus Rising: A New Year’s Omen for Women

This danger

is a danger of love, of complete love

toward all of life, toward all lives.

Pablo Neruda

-Are you afraid of what the New Year might bring?

Does the danger of an unknown future make you feel depressed and powerless?

I have to admit that’s how I was feeling on New Year’s Day. News reports of terrorism, and my own lack of sleep the night before, had left me with a sense of foreboding. To clear my head, I took a night walk after dinner.

As I stepped out alone into the silence, my eye was caught by a vision in the west. What looked like a bright, clear star had risen above the Moon. It was the planet Venus, shining for this one night brighter than anything in the sky: Venus, planet of love, named for Aphrodite, powerful goddess of love and inner beauty.

I walked towards the light, new thoughts flowing as my blood warmed. After a year of terrorism and intolerance, this was a vision of love ascendant. I found myself remembering Lysistrata, the ancient Greek story of women who made their men give up war. Then some lines from the 15th century mystic Hafiz came into my mind:

Women sometimes pronounce the word ‘God’

A little differently:

They can use more feeling and skill

With the heart-lute.

Now I no longer feel powerless. The Venus omen has brought me strong insights on how to live in a hostile world:

I do not have to measure my strength in terms of armed violence or brute force. (Instead, I can keep myself fit and physically strong, but still value and build skills associated with peace.)
I can use sensitivity, intelligence and intuition as my “weapons” against war.
I can replace being passive with taking action from the heart.
I can avoid news stories that disempower me, and focus instead on healing the world that is close by.
Even when those around me choose hate and intolerance, I can choose to live and lead my children by the principles of love, and God as love.

Do you have a story of a strong peacemaker you’d like to share? Have you experienced the power of love to turn a dangerous situation around? This blog is open to comments and welcomes ideas from parents, teachers and peacemakers of all ages. Can’t wait to hear from you!

HOW TO CREATE A NEW HEALTH IDENTITY: Taking Charge

“Nothing has more power to transform than awareness.” Deepak Chopra, 2012

Nature and Identity

Can Nature help form a new identity, free of the fears and sufferings of our family’s past? Many so-called “inherited” ailments are no longer necessary, made out-of-date by new findings in science. Yet, because we are descendants, the psychological hold on us may still be strong. Before we look at how a Nature connection can assist health, let me tell you about an unexpected encounter I had with a University of Toronto medical professor, who, over forty years had seen health trends in countless families.

Taking charge of my own health

I consulted Dr. Rodger Hines while I was a mature student at the university. After too many late nights studying with coffee, I was convinced I had a stomach ulcer. By way of introducing myself, I mentioned that I had many relatives with similar problems. To my astonishment, he replied: “So I expect you’ll have “indigestion” printed in gilt letters on your family crest.”

My first reaction was embarrassment, then a touch of resentment that he might be poking fun at us. I had expected him to order tests, repeat visits, a life-long prescription. Instead, he made me take charge of my own health.

To sum up:

– Doctor Hines suggested that I explore my family’s attitudes to illness, especially to symptoms I might currently be experiencing. He urged me to act as an impartial observer, a “reporter” whose health profile might be quite different from the vision I had formed from my family’s past. At first, I didn’t like the idea of separating my identity from my family.

– Then he explained that I was looking for clues to what I now think of a ‘self-created health identity’(quite possibly mistaken or outdated). As a way of connecting with my family, I might have subconsciously adopted suffering from the past.

– I soon found links between stories I had heard in childhood and symptoms I had considered chronic and “a part of who I am” for most of my adult life.

– The doctor put the ball back in my court by telling me to find a new way of feeling close to my family, one that did not involve my reliving events from their medical past. I found the courage to follow this approach when I realized that if my symptoms were unnecessary, I might find a way to avoid passing them on to my own children.

I’m happy to tell you that haven’t had chronic indigestion since that med-free consult with the exceptional Dr. Hines (sadly now deceased), and it’s been over twenty years.

FOLLOW-UP: If you would like to expIore your own health identity in this way, I’ve prepared a toolkit, which I can gladly provide for you to fill out privately. I use myself as a “how-to”example of how to question assumptions about one’s own health, but I’ve met many others who’ve shared this experience. Rob Hawke, author of Kicking Cancer’s Ass, tells how he overcame his inherited family belief that the diagnosis of cancer he received could only be fatal. He has moved way past the “terminal” deadline, and now spends his time helping others with similar diagnoses.

Since Rodger Hines handed me back responsibility for my own health, I’ve spent very little time in doctor’s offices. I have, however, spent a lot of time with Nature. This leads to the next section of this topic, Nature and Identity. If we find, by exploring and research, that the health identity we’ve created for ourselves is outdated or even mistaken, we need to shed that false identity and find a different one. The first key way Nature can find new aspects of our identity is first to help us lose it. In our next session, we’ll look at some techniques and strategies for doing this, and for finding a new sense of self in Nature.

For now, I’d like to share with you a piece I wrote in response to someone who suddenly did lose their identity as the result of an accident. His story helped me to visualize the inherent strength and health we each hold within us, independent of any name we might be given. (Continued… )

To discuss this topic further, contact us on Facebook

Overwhelmed by Back to Work and School? How to let your Energy Soar…

Now let us, like amorous birds of prey,

Rather at once our time devour

Than languish in his slow-chapt power …

Thus, though we cannot make our sun stand still,

Yet we will make him run.

Andrew Marvell

Ever feel that life is passing you by?

Ever wonder why others seem to enjoy life and work more than you do?

To find out why, start by measuring your Energy IQ:

Self-Test: Find out your Energy IQ

On a scale of 1 for very low and 10 for the highest, use this very personal, informal quiz to rate yourself in the following areas:

Belief
I consider myself basically a high-energy person, based on my medical and family background.

Self-Awareness
I recognize that I, and no one else, have the most important role to play in raising my own energy level.

Pro-Active Mindset
Every morning I begin with a plan for how I will boost my energy at key points during the day.

Self Reliance
I’m not addicted to caffeine or any other drug. I know that true and lasting energy comes from a healthy body.

Health Knowledge
I know that what I eat and when I have it, will have a huge impact on my energy. I apply this information to every meal, drink and snack.

Habits
I don’t just dream about more energy, I have habits I follow regularly to keep it coming.

Mental Self-Healing
If I feel a bad vibe coming on alone, or with fellow-complainers, I put some distance between myself and the negativity. I know how to walk away, and open myself to developing a different mood, which won’t suppress my energy.

Finding Stimulus
When bad weather makes the whole world weigh heavy, I know how to lighten my spirit by using my senses—my eyes, ears, touch, scent— to stimulate energy. Taste is not the only power of sense I have!

Creativity
I know that if suppress my unique creative talents, I will reduce my energy in all areas. So, I make sure I often explore my talents, and allow my creative urges the scope to raise my energy overall.

Giving
I understand that Nature provides each creature with life for a purpose. I don’t hoard my energy, but look for ways to benefit the world.

Your Score out of 100:

Disappointed in how you rated yourself? Don’t let it suppress your energy. Check this space on a weekly basis, and you’ll soon find proven ways to raise your energy IQ in all of the above areas. If you’re a 9 or 10 at any of them, drop us a comment on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/thenaturespath/ and let us share your tips. Can’t wait to hear from you!

How to Love Your Coworkers

Love is something we give to those in our family, but seldom bring with us to work. Today I’m thinking how it would empower each of us if we were to see ourselves as bringers of love and reassurance to those we work with.

This is a positive shift, simply because it takes us out of a passive role (their victim) and into an active one (their helper). Secondly, our energy is freed to reach its full potential because we are concentrating on giving rather than withholding.

Acceptance is a healthy choice because it allows us to move forward, instead of waiting for others to change. If we choose to accept people as they are, and take that as our starting point, then we need not spend another day paralyzed by anger or fear. It doesn’t mean we stop wanting to move toward something new. It means instead that we stop struggling.

It is the belief that we must struggle that is the trap, not the situation itself.

Struggling is a reactive mode, one that assumes that we are governed by the power (or lack of power) of others. Sometimes a coworker, or someone instrumental to our life, holds us back simply because they aren’t a match for us in terms of ability. Because we don’t want to hurt their feelings, this can cause us to fall into the trap of “trying” to do what we want, instead of going ahead and doing it. In reality, we aren’t doing the mismatched person any favours. By holding ourselves back for them, we’re keeping everyone stuck.

Others only have power over us if we seek their approval. If we let ourselves act independently of our weak egos, we free up our energy further. We no longer have to spend hours of each day worrying about what others might think. We can concentrate on allowing our own talents to benefit the world.

I believe fully that each of us has unique talents and should let what Nature gave us shine out! Those who feel threatened by us, or who simply can’t keep up, feel so because their talents and background lie elsewhere. They belong where they are better matched.

The world will thrive far more if we each simply release our talents to express themselves. This way we attract others with similar strengths and enjoyments, and no one need feel that anyone else is their burden or the one who must continue to carry them.

How to Love your Work

Why is work so hard? Why do so few of us feel creative and fulfilled by what we must do?

I ask myself this every time it’s my turn to do the housework, and the rest of the family leaves the house. This morning I resolved to make everything spic and span, until I remembered how hot, angry and frustrated I became last time. I simply couldn’t step back into the picture of myself from my last turn, when the dog ran all over the house in muddy paws, and the mop broke into five pieces leaving me to scrub on bare knees.

As I sip the last of my morning tea, I come across these words from over five hundred years ago.

Your separation from God, from love, is the hardest work in this world. -Hafiz (The Gift, translated by D. Ladinsky)

Entitled “A Cushion for your Head”, this extract from a mystic Sufi piece caught and held my attention. A sudden insight made me recognize its relevance to my own problem. As long as my family was there, and with them, love, I could do even the dirtiest work without feeling resentful.

Most of us, as parents, can remember such examples. Often, a baby would throw up all over me, and the only effect would be to intensify the bliss of mother love. This kind of joy is not only restricted to work with family. Once, my three-month old son peed straight into a doctor’s ear, and the kind man just laughed.

Yet often while we’re working we feel bitter and resentful, divorced from the flow of love. Before parenthood, I worked as a civil servant in a building hidden from the public, where my office had no contact with those I was supposed to serve. For 15 years, my career seemed less and less meaningful until I finally quit. Yet my friend Penny, a social worker, had daily contact with people in trouble. Her work was much harder, and more challenging, yet she was motivated to continue many years longer.

As the above quote sums up, it’s not the work itself, but the “separation” that’s the problem. If we can overcome this feeling of isolation, we can energize our work and our lives. I am not writing to convince you to join any religious sect. In fact, I find this quote most helpful when I don’t interpret it as part of a formal, orthodox relationship with God. I believe Hafiz, a highly individualist Sufi prophet, who speaks with respect of Jesus, Buddha and Mohammed, is talking about God as the love that flows through us.

Creativity has become a bad word, especially among accountants, but one thing is evident whether God or Science is the Creator of our world:

Life, and our survival on this planet, relies on continued creativity. There are multiple ways this can happen. Yet if we believe in denial, if we cannot find any way to be creative, then we are working against life.

Three Ways to Make Work Easier

1) Stop calculating, and start feeling.

All of us know how it feels to become energized by the spirit of love, as we feel it for others. Pet therapy, for example, has helped many Seniors turn around from deathbed situations. No matter how small, how simple, the gift we give to the world, we are nourished by the giving of it.

When we are not giving, or not seeing the positive results of our giving, we shrivel up into a shell. Our only purpose becomes to protect ourselves, and the wealth we have accumulated. Yet those who calculate theirs among the highest riches are often the most miserly and lead the poorest lives. They become unable even to be generous to their loved ones, even themselves.

A close friend from a wealthy family wanted to play the guitar. His father, an accountant, insisted on a financial career. As my friend grew older and wiser, he saw how limiting his work with numbers was. He found a way to bridge toward another life. He volunteered to help musicians overcome their tax difficulties. In this way, he found friends who helped him enter a world where he has now found a balance between work and art.

2) Engage in an active, evolving spiritual relationship with the world.

When we allow ourselves to explore, rather than calculate spiritual gains as though they were money, we become true expressions of the divine. Jesus said: “Seek ye first the Kingdom of God.” He was a seeker all his life. He did not remain hidden in a cloister of rules. He worked among the common people, searching and finding new ways to bring divine love to them.

3) Let your Gift take on a momentum of its own.

Perhaps you have chosen unfulfilling work out of obedience to your parents, or the way you were brought up. Maybe it seems that denying your brightest talent in order just to serve time at work, is the way to show love to your own children.

Yet the Bible says “Do not hide your light under a bushel.” Even if we do not believe in God, it’s easy to see, as parents, that when we deny our talents, we are teaching our children to do the same.

My mother was a gifted painter, and my father was born with a superb singing voice. Yet they both abandoned these, and told us it was for our sake. All my life, especially when I see films of great sons of great fathers, like Mozart and Renoir, I wish that my parents has allowed their art to enter our lives even in a small way.

Why danger can be good for your child

…this danger

is danger of love, of complete love

toward all of life,

toward all lives

-Pablo Neruda (Nobel Laureate)

As parents, we want to keep our children safe. Perhaps no generation has been kept as withdrawn as the current one. Recent research shows that today‘s kids go outdoors 50 per cent less than we did at school age. That percentage is alarming enough in itself, but what if we multiply it by another generation or two? If reduction in nature activity continues at this rate, our long-term descendants might face life as prisoners of the indoors, in a world limited by the frame around their screen.

How has this reduction in physical play happened? One way is that when both parents are working full-time, there is no adult ‘safety anchor’ in the home to make free exploration viable. In many homes this translates into no outdoor play till Mom or Dad gets home. Yet by that time it’s often too dark and parents are too tired to take on anything active. So, like much of the school day, the entire after-school time is spent locked in a seat: a brief break for dinner, perhaps homework and then back to the gaming chair. We are keeping our children confined for most of their lives. But how safe, in truth, is this routine for them?

Because they are so inactive, our children’s generation is facing higher rates of obesity and related diseases then any before. Study after study shows them at an unprecedented risk. So how can a working parent support a child?

1) Trade the certain danger of being an inactive child for what I call the ‘beneficial dangers’ of getting out of a chair.

Examples of this:

Take a night hike with your child, wearing reflective clothing and headlamps to spot interesting nocturnal life.

Sign the whole family up for evenings at the local YMCA or Community Centre. Let each family member pick their favourite activity: from rock-climbing, to swimming, to Tai Kwon Do.

If transport is a problem, keep the exercise close to home with spot-lit trampoline in the backyard.

2) Plan to keep Nature a part of your family’s life (no matter the weather)

When snow lights up the evenings, build an ice rink for skating or simply release your family into the delights of forts, ice sculptures and snowballs. Walking with their parents round the neighbourhood will make them the first to spot changes such as a “haunted house” or Christmas lights!

Make simple purchases (such as cheap rubber boots and plastic capes) to ensure rain outings are possible. Buy these for yourself, too, and learn to enjoy the scent of fresh-washed air.

For times when going out simply won’t be possible, bring the wild to your home. Help your child plan, seed and grow an indoor garden. Consider getting at least one pet for your family. Skills like grooming, feeding and caring for a living creature enable your child to develop emotional intelligence and prepare for important life relationships.

3) Make balance, not indulgence, the first parenting principle for your child.

(Recognize that being responsive to your child doesn’t mean indulging every urge.)

Yes, your youngster will play with his iPad till he collapses at 3am, but he and his teachers will one day thank you for putting it away (and keeping it from him) much earlier. Bedtime stories are a good way to break the gaming cycle and ensure quality time for literacy and family bonds.

4) Limit the time your family members spend alone with devices.

Scheduling is probably the greatest challenge parents face today. So, become an expert at it. Set up regular routines so that it becomes easier to get your child away from a computer. If you just leave him to it, it’s obvious that he will have more and more trouble becoming engaged with other living beings. “Alone together” is a phrase without meaning. If each of you is pursuing a separate virtual world, there will be no togetherness.

5)Access the power of your child’s own creativity.

Be assured, your child’s natural imagination can be your strongest ally in overcoming a videogame obsession.

Plan special outings and new books from the library to read and act aloud, so that you’re offering something interesting as an alternate to technology. My son was spending four hours a night playing video games, till we asked him to act out his favourite books for us. Now it’s the first thing he asks to do when we get home. He gives readings while we do our evening chores, and keeps the family together and well-entertained!

Your input would be most welcome:

I’d love to hear your ideas for loving, non-punitive ways to pull a child back from the virtual towards the natural world. I’d also like to find out what you’d like to see in this space in the future. You can comment, make a request, or simply like us on Facebook.

Category: Uncategorized